Rubus phoenicolasius (to the boy in the weeds)

from Letters by Jess and the prolonged existence

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lyrics

saw you squatting in the leaves
picking wild wineberries
you offered one to me
and as it fell into the space between my teeth
it suddenly occurred to me how much i love you

i took you up to the mountain where the crucifixes stood
but we rode it backwards,
saw iron leaving wood
then suddenly he is alive
and he awakes and is untied
falling feet find dark, damp earth
you made me feel like jesus in reverse

it's cold in the backseat of your brother's car
and you are feeding me,
jam on your lips is tart
but there's something lurking underneath
eating holes in my stomach,
i am losing sleep
you touch me but you're far away
one foot out the door while you beg me to stay

for now it's time to leave
that is what you said to me
so i backed into the street
as the earth slid from my feet
and i miss you in my bed
but i'm scared of what is in your head
and i want you in every way
but i think i will die if i wait for you

credits

from Letters, released December 27, 2020

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